THANKSGIVING MEANS CORN. ONLY ALL-CAPS CAN EXPRESS HOW MUCH THANKSGIVING IS CORN. THANKSGIVING CORN MUST BE HUGE CORN. CORN CORN CORN!

THIS CORN IS HUGE!

THIS CORN IS ALSO HUGE!

THIS CORN IS BIGGER THAN YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!

YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE CORN.

GOD’S VERY OWN ANGELS CAN’T HANDLE THE CORN!

THERE’S SO MUCH CORN IT COMES IN THREE-PACKS!

THIS CORN IS SO PUMPED IT’S ACHINGLY ERECT!

THIS CORN IS BIGGER THAN A GODDAM PUMPKIN!

FRICKING TURKEYS CAN RIDE IN THIS CORN!

GODDAMIT I GOTTA WRAP A BOW AROUND MY CORN!

CORN!

Save